angerinyourbones:

Study after study after study shows that spanking children causes anger, aggression, decreased impulse control, anxiety, lower thresholds for frustration etc etc

You didn’t “turn out just fine” because you were smacked, you turned out “just fine” IN SPITE of it.

I also wouldn’t call someone who thinks violence against children is okay “just fine” but.. Y’know.

gowns:

you all need to stop settling

stop putting yourself in the presence of people who make you feel confused or less-than

don’t try to salvage a friendship if they make you feel like shit

don’t try to get into the brain of someone who’s closing themselves off to you

don’t try to start…

lamegrownup:

i dont trust people who are attracted to me…like why? write me a 10 page paper with a legitimate thesis and valid points backing up your claim or you fake.

With the childhood abuse thing, how did you overcome it? Because it seems impossible.

stripperina:

For me, there is no “overcoming” childhood trauma in the sense that it no longer effects me in any way.  It will always have some level of effect on me. 

At one point I was exploring the concept of grief (a friend/mentor had died unexpectedly) and came to the realization that grief is not something you move through and past, but something that moves through you.  I had always imagined it as a forest that you entered, walk through for a while, and eventually exited.  But that was inaccurate.  It is more like the wind.  Sometimes it is still and you cannot feel it at all, and other times it is so strong you can barely stand, but it is the one that is moving and changing while you stand still.  It is never gone completely, but it’s also never going to always be there in a debilitating way.  It moves through us in a perceptible way until it doesn’t.

So the goal is not to “overcome” it.  In my experience, these are the four steps that will help you heal and thrive after surviving abuse and/or trauma:

  1. Accept that it happened.
  2. Eliminate self-blame.
  3. Show empathy toward all your feelings.
  4. Remember you are valuable.

To be more specific, 1. Accept that what happened DID in fact happen. Blocking it out or bottling it up won’t make it go away, it only prolongs the healing process.  2. Recognize that you are not to blame.  Nothing that happened to you was a result of your own actions and nothing about who you are as a person means you deserved it.  3. Show yourself empathy for any lingering feelings about what happened.  All your feelings that are a result of your trauma are valid, whether that’s anger or fear or sadness or relief or a lack of feeling anything at all.  and 4. Remember that it doesn’t effect your value or self worth as a person.  You are NOT dirty or damaged or less deserving of respect because of what happened to you.  You are still strong and loveable and deserving of respect and kindness. 

Working on those four steps will the easier it is to move through life without dragging the weight or your abuse behind you wherever you go.  You may not be able to “overcome” past trauma, but you CAN survive it and live a happy, fruitful life despite it.

we-are-shawarma:

secretsofaginger:

Actual Disney Princess: Lupita Nyong’o

STOP BEING SO PRETTY I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT

except that’s not lupita it’s Herieth Paulits in ops original tags.

cassandrajp:

tarynel:

lastnightsmusings:

"i am not at all physically attracted to you"

is an absolutely valid reason to not want to date someone.

People had the nerve to call me shallow for this.

By the way, it’s also totally cool to turn someone down without explaining your reasons. You are not interested, no will suffice. Do not feel pressured to explain your decisions to someone else. 

oops it’s afternoon

katiepieforce
Anonymous

This little buttmunch of a brat she’s such a little shit I’m gonna punch her in the boob.

But seriously she’s my best friend and she’s just the best person in my life right now I don’t know how I got so lucky. I’m going through a really hard time right now and she’s just being so amazing and supportive even thought it must be exhausting to hear about it.

I really do love my kit kat and I hope she always has good days and that her pizza pockets are always cooked all the way through.

REBLOG | Posted 1 week ago With 1 note
DyeMeLikeASunset >.> <.<

MY ABSOLUTELY AMAZING ART DAD AHHH

No but seriously Papa Ty and Papi Bee have increased my quality of life by an incredible amount. They’re just both so wonderfully body positive and inclusive and I’ve learned so much about myself and grown so much as a person since discovering their work just holy crap.

Honestly I can’t think of a single reason you shouldn’t at LEAST follow their art blogs if not their regular blogs. @dyemelikeasunset and @mothsbymoonlight

REBLOG | Posted 1 week ago With 1 note

is it too much to ask that the dryers here yknow DRY MY CLOTHES

» Leave a url or name in my ask box, and I’ll give you my 100% honest opinion of them
Can you explain more about why you're against spanking? I agree, I'd just like to hear what you have to say.

j0ye:

  • it is hurting someone
  • your child, specifically, who should not be hurt by you of all people
  • it doesnt work in the long term
  • it develops trust issues
  • it is reliant on fear, and teaches them to be afraid instead of actually learning what they did and how to self-discipline (i.e., “mommy spanked me when i tried crossing the road by myself, so i shouldn’t do it in front of her so i don’t get spanked” instead of “mommy told me i could get hurt if i cross the road by myself, so i won’t do it”)
  • it asserts the ideology of stronger = right, and that because someone hurts you they are correct
  • it shows that violence solves issues, which causes your child not only to normalize violence, but to partake in it
  • it disregards bodily autonomy (as in people not touching you without your consent)
  • it hurts their self-esteem, as well as affects their mental health, and their intelligence
  • it becomes a gateway to harsher abuse due to desensitization
  • it creates detachment of the parent/child bond
  • it normalizes degrading and harmful behavior on the parent’s end
  • it continues on the cycle of abuse
  • it’s just overall shitty don’t hit someone, especially not someone who is smaller than you, defenseless, and VERY easily affected by it ok just don’t

Artist:
Angel Haze
Track:
Battle Cry (Acoustic)
Plays:
1,144 plays

perfectsimon:

Angel Haze // Battle Cry (Acoustic)

Sometimes you have to hurt for the cause to be reached
But one day you’ll be stronger than all that you beat

Angel Haze - Drunk In Love (lyrics)

GO HORDT